In the book “Why Men Love B******” by Sherry Argov, many principles of attraction are discussed that I think are important for women to know and understand. Take this time to have an open mind and self evaluate as I have listed seven of the principles below. It is time to go from “a doormat to a dreamgirl” in the words of Sherry.
- Anything a person chases in life runs away. Chasing a man leads him to believe you are desperate or are willing to devalue yourself for him. This only results to him losing respect for you and losing the desire to get closer to you. A dreamgirl will not kill herself to impress anyone.
- The women who have the men climbing the walls for them are not always exceptional. Often, they are the ones who don’t appear to care that much. This is about whether you are needy or an equal partner in the relationship. This principle is about holding your own. Men like a mental challenge. The mental challenge has to do with whether you expect to be respected. It has to do with how you relate to him. It has to do with whether he knows that you aren’t afraid to be without him.
- A woman is perceived as offering a mental challenge to the degree that a man doesn’t feel he has a 100 percent hold on her. Here, is where you just focus on being good company. That is it. That is all. This is more than enough until he “earns” more. Below is a chart using a few different scenarios to explain the difference between the doormat and the dreamgirl as it pertains to this principle.
“I Am Not Enough.”
She calls him often and says “Please return my call.”
She is on call like a rookie flight attendant.
She makes it obvious a relationship is her goal before she knows much about him.
When he does call her, she is mad that he didn’t call sooner.
“I Am Enough. Take It Or Leave It.”
She gets back to him when she is free.
She sees him when it is convenient for her.
She goes out to have fun and doesn’t make promises to a stranger.
When he calls her, he is curious where she is and why she isn’t there with him.
- Sometimes a man deliberately won’t call, just to see how you will respond. It is human nature for a man to test the waters to see how much he can get away with. You see it in the behavior of children and pets. Pulling away is also something men do to gain reassurance. He will pull away to see how you react. Take note of your attitude and how you respond to him. Not calling or pulling away gives a man something he needs, which is the freedom to breathe, so how you react will determine if he will continue to come your way or move on.
- If you start out dependent, it turns him off. But if it is something he can’t have, it becomes more of a challenge for him to get it. It is about understanding human nature and acting accordingly. When a man meets a woman that comes across as nonchalant, it becomes a challenge for him to win her affections. When a man tries to get a woman to react in a way that shows her insecurities, but she holds her own, the dynamic suddenly changes.
- It is your attitude about yourself that a man will adopt. The first date is about your looks. When he actually falls in love it is about your attitude. It is all about how you hold yourself.
- Act like a prize and you’ll turn him into a believer. Once you display confidence, he will become intrigued with you. How you treat yourself, he will do the same. If you treat yourself as a prize, then he will believe you are a prize. But the trick isn’t turning him on or getting him to like you, it is whether he stays turned on after he has been satisfied. Keeping the spark in the relationship. Keeping him intrigued and interested in you. You must know how to sustain this dynamic of your relationship.
Remember he may accept a doormat, but he desires a dreamgirl!
Love 101 