Blog #2 of the Relationship Goals series based on the book written by Michael Todd
Singleness > Dating > Engagement > Marriage > Love > Children
Singleness is the most important season. During this season God reveals to you who you truly are. All of the aspects listed below becomes more clear to you during this season:
- Self Awareness
- Focused
- Purpose
- Healing
Patience – one of the fruits of the spirit – allows you to indulge in all of those. Each of those aspects of your life should become stronger than ever during this season. Singleness is a phase of preparation. You are preparing yourself for a relationship. You must invest in yourself before you can invest into someone else.
Singleness > Dating > Engagement > Marriage > Love > Children
Now, when I say dating, I am talking about exclusively dating one person at one time. Get to know someone and date them with intentions. Date with the goal being long term. You have a purpose and you have a goal. Recreational dating may be fun, but it becomes very devastating and harmful. Intentional dating will, soon, lead you to a covenant marriage, which leads us to engagement.
Singleness > Dating > Engagement > Marriage > Love > Children
We all know about engagements. The man gets down on one knee and asks the woman the big question. You plan to spend the rest of your lives together in holy matrimony. Everything is peaches and cream. But, let’s talk about before you get to the wedding. During the engagement stage, they are three main things you want to make sure you have tackled head on before you tie the knot.
- Discuss your relationship fears
- Agree on boundaries
- Have focused conversations
You want to have open communication with your partner and discuss the deeper content of the relationship that you may find challenging to discuss. Really, these three things would be great to discuss while you are intentionally dating before you become engaged. Once, you guys see eye to eye on these things is when you should feel comfortable tying the knot.
Singleness > Dating > Engagement > Marriage > Love > Children
Marriage is the stage where you and your partner are one with God. As I stated in the previous blog, 1 + 1 + 1 = 1 because you, your spouse, and God are all one! During marriage you are, also, able to practice SAFE sex.
S is for sacred. Meaning it is set apart and considered holy. It is connected and dedicated to God.
A is for anointed. Meaning God has stamped his approval.
F is for faithful. Meaning to strive to remain faithful to God and your spouse.
E is for exclusive. Meaning sex should only be between the two of you.
Singleness > Dating > Engagement > Marriage > Love > Children
Now, many of you may be wondering why love comes after marriage in this relationship progression. Trust me, I was too. According to Michael Todd, once you are married and committed to each other for life, a fuller, more mature love will be discovered. One that goes much deeper than the surface. I assume only married couples can attest to that (and I am not married).
Singleness > Dating > Engagement > Marriage > Love > Children
Then, lastly, comes children. Bringing children into the world to build a family and to carry own a legacy is a beautiful thing. Children are offspring. To create a human being that is half of you and your spouse is magical. Children are a blessing and once you have already accomplished the five stages prior to children in the progression of relationships, then reproducing and creating a perfect little human being with your spouse is the “cherry on top”.
Love 101 